About my birthday (yes it's far awayyy)

So I've been obsessing about my birthday. It's still quite far away, roughly 5 and a halfish weeks to be exact. I'm excited, but dreading. Again, another event without Mama, but excited that fate would have it that the first birthday without my mom I can legally drink my sorrows away. There's a silver lining to every little dark cloud isn't there... :-/

And I know it sounds really immature and kind of stupid to most people, but that's exactly how I plan to spend it. Doing everything the way that Mama wouldn't have done it. Because if I do it differently, then it will be as if she wasn't meant to be there. It won't be so obvious that she's missing.

I don't want a family celebration. I don't want a birthday cake. I don't want balloons or stupid presents. If you want to buy me a present, give me the cash and I'll add it to my alcohol monies jar (no that wasn't a joke) or go buy a fabulous pair of shoes. And btw, I blew my budget even more tonight by buying two pairs of shoes tonight...but they were oh so on sale, little blueish granny loafers that look like they collided with a glow stick, and fabulous BCBG black ("stripper"...as Karee called them haha) heels. Every girl needs sexy heels, right?

And I just realized the last few posts where I've actually written something it's been about the very thing I don't want to think about.... Uggggghhhhhh....

Anyway...sleep time for me and more Sigur Rós (yes I'm in a phase, I also just priced tickets from Atlanta to Reykjavik, Iceland, and the price is doable if I plan ahead...oh how heavenly that would be...)

a song for nightthinking (part II it seems)

It seems like I can think more clearly at night. It's like oh, it's 11:00 time to go to bed...oh wait, I have five million thoughts rolling around in my head and I can't sleep just yet. I go through phases like this. I used to spend my nights roaming the campus of Clemson, rain or clear, sitting on Bowman Field, sitting on the bench, smoking cloves, reading in the street light, listening to night sounds, to music...just being unable to sleep, and unable to breathe in my dorm room while my darling roommate slept peacefully...

Well now my sleeplessness appears to be returning...

So I hit play on iTunes, iPod, iWhatever, and listen to Sigur Ros and feel kind of safe and secure in my pink "cave" (as Sarah named it) and tap tap tap away on my lap top or in my little black notebook or whatever.

Last night I posted a song off of Sigur Ros' new album "Med sud i eyrum vid spilum endalaust" called Fljótavík. I've also added it to my "songs of the hour" section in the upper right hand corner of this page.

Please listen to it.

It's beautiful, it's heartbreaking, it's hopeful, it's rendering, it's simple and mysterious, and it makes me want to cry endless tears, but I feel a smile coming at the same time.

Sigur Rós' lyrics are obviously in Icelandic/Hopelandic so one can't understand them, and in the end I don't think you really need too, because the very sound of it speaks to you. But just out of curiosity last night I decided to see what the translation to this beautifully shattering song was. And it seemed appropriate, in an odd way, and made me think of the picture that I posted beside it last night... I really hope that it's as lovely to you as it is to me.

Fljótavík

Sjáum yfir rá We look over the rudder
Sjóinn skerum frá Cut off the sea
Við siglum mastri trú We sail by the mast
Seglum þöndum Stretch the Sails
Við stýrum að í brú We steer towards the bridge

Við siglum í land We sail ashore
Í stórgrýti og sand Up on the large rocks and the sand
Við vöðum í land We wade ashore
Ófremdarástand What a mess
Já, anskotann Fuckin' yea...

Feginn fann ég þar There I found myself
Þökkum ákaflega Endlessly thanking
Í skjóli neyðarhúss Sheltered in a makeshift house
Og við sváfum And we slept
Stórviðri ofsaði út As the storm died down...

Feginn fann ég þar
Þökkum ákaflega
Í skjóli neyðarhúss
Og við sváfum
Stórviðri ofsaði út

Bonnaroo Flashes (in & out of order)

-crazy nails; -crazy boys

-Tennessee green; -traffic

-can scupture; -planet roo

-super graffiti

Roo excitement!


our feet...which were seriously swollen by day 4

MGMT & the ferris wheel

Battles

cool tree lights & kat under the tree

campinggg

grasshopper; dave & kat

pirate dave

yum food

dale & kat; drive-by truckers with the crowd

fountain of peace :)

smiles & blue skiesss

icies were a savior
tegan & sara!

awesome hammocks

Roo love = hardmetal guys swaying to the Swell Season :)

Rilo Kiley <3


Metallicaaa!


(above) at MSTRKRFT; (below) Tiesto


waiting on pearl jam


iron & wine (sam beam)

dale discovers sparkle-wear; and super cool dirt


sigur ros

dancing girl

glowsticks & arts

roo on parade

aaaaah!

death cab for cutie

kat & boys